


wedding bells

by _helios (neocitz)



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Misunderstandings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-09
Updated: 2018-05-09
Packaged: 2019-05-04 11:10:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,744
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14591748
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/neocitz/pseuds/_helios
Summary: Lucas gets roped into helping his boyfriends plan their wedding.(He, unfortunately, never caught onto the fact that they proposed to him.)





	wedding bells

**Author's Note:**

  * For [taeyongseo](https://archiveofourown.org/users/taeyongseo/gifts).



> This is 90% Carly's Fault, she left a cc prompt that spiraled out of control just a little bit
> 
> un-beta'd

Lucas feels like he’s got javascript tattooed on the back of his eyelids. He and his team had discovered a bug in the code at about lunchtime, and what should have been an easy fix unravelled into six hours of cursing and typing. It’s eight o’clock at night, and he’s only just reached the apartment. This is the last time he stays late after work, definitely.

(He thought that two weeks ago, and a month before that.)

‘I’m home!’ he shouts as he pulls off his shoes, dropping them into a pile by the front door. He places his laptop down with more care, because even if he doesn’t want to touch it for another day, he spent a lot of money on his baby. ‘Sorry I’m late.’

Jungwoo looks up from his books, sprawled across the kitchen table, and smiles. ‘Hey, Xuxi.’

Lucas’ breath catches in his throat because Jungwoo is so fucking cute. He’s got his reading glasses on and his hair is a mess from the number of times he’s run his fingers through it. He can’t help walking over and lifting the glasses off Jungwoo’s face and cupping his jaw. The older boy’s eyes crinkle up more and Lucas swoops in to kiss him.

It’s lazy, because they’re both exhausted to the bone, but that doesn’t stop Lucas from tipping Jungwoo’s head back further and Jungwoo from letting out a small, satisfied sigh. He can taste the coffee on Jungwoo’s lips, and tries to chase the taste of it. But Jungwoo pulls back and turns back to the history book in front of him. ‘Don’t try to distract me. I’ve got three more pages to read and then I’m done.’

‘How long has it been since he moved?’

Lucas abandons Jungwoo to his study, padding over to the stove. Jungwoo might be cute and open to welcome home kisses, but he’s brought textbooks with him to fire drills. He once rolled out of bed in the middle of post-sex cuddles (a.k.a. the best cuddles) just because he had been “inspired”. Lucas isn’t going to be able to get anything more from him until he’s finished those three pages.

‘I got home at four and he’s gone to the bathroom once,’ Kun says, he tips his head to the side automatically as Lucas winds strong arms around his waist. Lucas loves him like this, pliant and comfortable in the relative silence of their home. He presses butterfly kisses to the side of Kun’s neck, giggling when Kun squirms slightly — he’s always been more on the ticklish side. ‘I tried getting him to move, but even cookies couldn’t tempt him away.’

‘Did you try anything else?’ The butterfly kisses get sharper as he nips at Kun’s neck.  

And gets an elbow into the stomach in return. ‘ _Xuxi_ ,’ Kun warns, smile in his voice. ‘Not when I’m next to an open flame.’

‘Fine,’ Lucas groans, pulling away. ‘I’ll just go and have a shower or something. On my own.’ He wiggles his eyebrows at Kun, hoping to tempt his oldest boyfriend into the shower with him. It doesn’t work, because Kun just pushes his face away and turns back to the stove.

Lucas is exactly the sort of shameless that doesn’t wait to get to the bedroom to start stripping down. He unbuttons his shirt, making a big deal of it as he stretches with a groan. It drops off his shoulders and he can’t help smirking at an exasperated Kun.

Still, he knows better to try and stop either of them when they’re studying and cooking. It’s a sacred law of their apartment, like they know not to try and disturb him too much when he’s coding.

‘Wait,’ Jungwoo calls, and he puts his highlighter down. Willingly. Lucas stops in the entry to their bedroom, knowing how serious this is, shirt in one hand and unbuckling his belt with the other. Jungwoo stands up and he looks to Kun in the kitchen.

They have one of their silent conversations. All eyebrows and head tilts that Lucas can barely decipher. He communicates in words and extravagant waves of his hand, they practically read each other’s minds.

‘Xuxi,’ Jungwoo turns to face him. He’s as exhausted as ever, bags under his eyes and jumper slipping off his shoulder. Lucas doesn’t want to be the one to tell him, but there’s a streak of highlighter on his cheek. But there’s something in his voice, something that catches at Lucas and makes him look between the two. ‘We have something to talk to you about.’

Kun turns the heat down and walks to stand next to Jungwoo. He wraps an arm around Jungwoo’s shoulders, who rests his head against Kun’s abdomen. It’s one of the most beautiful images that Lucas has ever seen, his two boys smiling at each other and he wants to preserve it, remember this moment when the three of them were together and so in love.

They share another long look, another conversation of a thousand words in a few blinks and twitches of the lips.

‘We want to get married,’ Kun says, and if it was anyone else Lucas might have thought they blurted it out. But Kun is level and mature and every word he says has meaning and intention and thought, and Lucas can hear all of that behind the five words said.

Jungwoo smiles at Kun and it turns to Lucas and it’s so blinding that it hurts.

‘Oh,’ Lucas says, because he doesn’t know what to say. His breath is in his throat and so is his heart. He looks from Kun to Jungwoo, and then back to Kun and they’re both smiling at him and he forces that grin onto his face because he can’t ruin this for them. ‘Wow! Yeah, okay.’ He scratches at his neck. ‘ _Wow_.’

 

 

The benefits of crying in the shower is that no-one can tell, because the water washes away your shame. Lucas wipes his face dry with a towel, and he can almost pretend he didn’t spend the last fifteen minutes with tears and snot running down his face.

Almost.

He drops the towel on the floor as he wanders into the bedroom and sprawls out across the bed. There’s probably about fifteen minutes until he has to go outside to join them for dinner, and he’s going to try and stretch that time as much as he can. He wonders if he can fake an emergency, say that he needs to go back to the office because the site is down but then he thinks about how happy they looked.

Deep breaths rattle through Lucas, and he digs his teeth into his lip to try and stave off the sobs that are threatening to break out again. He’s in control and he can deal with this, he’s a grown-up with a grown-up job and he’s not going to break into tears again.

He’s loud in all aspects of his life, there’s no way he’d be able to cry without Jungwoo and Kun hearing him. Lucas sits up, brushing away the tears with the palm of his hand, and wanders to the large closet that houses all their clothes.

He pulls out a pair of track pants and a shirt, wondering if that’s appropriate to wear to Kun and Jungwoo’s engagement dinner. But they’re low-key people, so they probably won’t mind too much if he doesn’t wear a tie or underwear. He thinks that if he has to wear proper pants he might start crying again, which is absolutely not what he wants to do.

He’s going to save that for tomorrow when they’ve left for work and he’s got an hour two for himself.

For now, he has to smile, because he loves them so much and they deserve this happiness.

He can’t ruin this for them.

(That doesn’t stop him from grabbing his old gym bag, tucked away in the corner of the closet, and stuffing as much of his clothes into it as he dares.)

 

 

‘Kun and I were thinking,’ Jungwoo says, climbing onto Lucas’ lap and pulling the Xbox controller away from his grasp, ‘that we don’t need to do the big hall and guest thing.’ He’s brushing his lips against Lucas’, the ghost of a touch, as he talks. ‘We just want to keep this low-key and special. For us, you know?’

Lucas is very confused right now.

Because Jungwoo is grinding down on him, _just right_ , but he’s talking about his wedding. And Kun’s not even at home at the moment.

‘Mmmm.’ He reaches back for the controller, and Jungwoo catches his hand in a surprisingly tight grasp.

Jungwoo pouts, a whiny little _Xuxi_ that Lucas is so used to hearing when Jungwoo wants something. He draws Jungwoo’s head back and to the side, and it allows him to breath for a moment. Lucas runs his teeth, feather-light, along the length of Jungwoo’s exposed neck and the older man lets out a little sigh.

‘So,’ Jungwoo’s breath hitches as he arches his neck even more. ‘We were thinking, we can just do something a bit less pomp and circumstance and a bit more us.’

That makes sense, Lucas can admit, because Kun and Jungwoo aren’t for big declarations and displays. They share their love, let it imbue every aspect of their lives, but they don’t need to share it with the world because the world already knows.

They don’t need to have the large hall, the year of planning and stress. They just need each other, and those that they want to share it with.

 ‘So, you’re thinking something smaller? _Sooner_?’ The hand that isn’t tangled in Jungwoo’s hair slips down to rest on his waist. He rubs small circles with his thumb. It’s grounding, the stark realisation that soon Lucas won’t be able to hold Jungwoo like this.

‘Mmmm,’ Jungwoo leans into kiss Lucas again. It’s another soft brush before Lucas turns his cheek, ever so slightly, and runs his hand through Jungwoo’s hair again. ‘We were thinking sometime next month.’

Lucas thinks of the bag, filled but tossed in the corner of the closet. In this moment, Jungwoo beautiful and squirming on his lap, he remembers that this is reality. He has a month, unless they kick him out before then, before he can stop making excuses.

‘ _Xuxi_ ,’ Jungwoo whines and Lucas realises he’s spent too long in silence. He lets out a laugh, too-loud and too-bright and awkward in his throat, and he drags Jungwoo that bit closer. Jungwoo laughs, and his hands creep down to the waistline of Lucas’ track pants.

Lucas will take what he can get, he’s living on borrowed time.

 

 

Kun’s fingers twist with his, and he smiles up at Lucas as they stand on the elevator. It’s moments like this that Lucas can pretend that they’re ordinary, that things aren’t changing and that he’s not being left behind.

Except they’re on their way to the jewellers, to pick out Jungwoo’s ring.

‘Are you sure you won’t get in trouble?’ Kun asks. ‘You’re taking a lot of time off work for this.’

‘I’ve got flexible hours for a reason,’ Lucas explains. ‘After all the times I’ve had to stay behind until seven, I deserve a day off here and there to work on other important things.’

‘Brilliant,’ Kun lets out a relieved sigh. ‘I was so worried I’d have to do this on my own. Not that I thought you’d skip out, but you’ve had a lot more work recently.’

‘We’re rolling out the new website soon,’ Lucas lies. ‘I need to get as much debugging done as I can.’

Perhaps part of it might be because he doesn’t know where he stands, in the space of their little apartment, now that he knows that he’s on the way out. He spends more and more time at the office, and returns to find Kun and Jungwoo curled around each other in bed.

They don’t need to make space for him anymore but one of them will curl into his body and complain about his feet and about how they miss him.  Lucas has taken to crying in the shower in the morning, overwhelmed by how awful and terrible and beautiful this all is.

‘I’m glad you made the time,’ Kun repeats and his smile is so beautiful when it’s directed at Lucas. He rests his head against Lucas’ chest a moment, smiling up at him, before they make their way across to where the jeweller is.

Lucas can’t help watching him, because Kun looks like the world is in the palm of his hands as he inspects the rings. And he looks fucking beautiful.

 

 

Lucas doesn’t realise how much planning goes into a wedding until they’re sitting at the kitchen table, bent over a folder that Kun’s filled with brochures. He’s got his laptop out, meant to be using it for research, but he has a text editor out and he’s opened up the code for a simple game to distract himself.

He can’t bring himself to argue when Kun takes him by the hand, pulls him over to the table and sits him down.

‘We need to work on a timeline,’ Kun explains, fingers playing with Lucas’ absently as he flicks through the book. Lucas wants to grasp tight and never let go, and he spends too long staring at their joined fingers before Kun clears his throat. ‘Just because we’re not going with a traditional wedding, doesn’t mean we should half-ass it.’

Kun draws his hand away to flick through the book and Lucas feels cold as they turn to each other.

He wishes that he could just plug his headphones in, block out the sounds of Jungwoo and Kun chattering for a moment. He doesn’t want to have to think about this damn wedding, not when every step they take towards it is a step away from him.

But also, he wants this to be the best night of their damn lives.

‘We’re rushing it, so we’re going to have to split the tasks between us. Trust each other’s opinion?’ Kun looks up at Jungwoo at that, and there’s a small shared smile that doesn’t feel so nice to look at anymore.

Lucas ducks behind the laptop, bending slightly as his fingers fly over the keys. He hopes they don’t notice him furiously blinking, because in the last week he’s managed to downgrade from earth shattering sobbing.

‘Xuxi?’ Jungwoo’s voice cuts through and Lucas looks up. ‘Is that okay?’

‘Sounds great,’ he says, and hopes he didn’t agree to something that he’ll later regret.

 

 

One of Kun’s work friends, Taeyong, offers to bake their cakes for them.  

‘It’s fine,’ he says with a dry laugh, waving Jungwoo and Lucas into the kitchen. ‘I spend five days a week staring down teenagers, I need to destress somehow.’

‘We can’t think you enough for this,’ Jungwoo says. ‘You’re a thousand times better than any professional, anyway.’

This time, Taeyong’s laugh is awkward. He’s never dealt well with compliments in the years that they’ve known him, and Jungwoo adores to make his friends feel unsettled with his soft voice and sweet words.

‘I mean, I’m not that good,’ he mutters. His cheeks are burning bright, and if Lucas wasn’t so thrown at being the one to help Jungwoo pick out the cakes, he might have joined in on the fun. ‘It’s just a hobby.’

‘There’s a reason you’re our first choice,’ Jungwoo says as Taeyong ushers them into a seat. ‘You’re just going to make this day all the most special for us.’

Lucas can’t help but agree, even as Jungwoo’s words sit so awkwardly in the pit of his stomach. There’s a subtle reminder that he’s not apart of the us and that he has three weeks left until he needs to move out and on from their lives.

He hopes that Donghyuck and Mark won’t mind him sleeping on their couch for a few nights. Because he doesn’t want to deal with looking for his own apartment, cold and empty and his, on top of trying to sort out this wedding stuff.

‘I’ve made a few samples,’ Taeyong explains, and he pulls out a tray of the quaintest, cutest looking cupcakes that Lucas has ever seen. ‘I thought you could try the different flavour combinations, see what works best for you?’

‘Sounds perfect, doesn’t it Xuxi?’

There’s a warning tone to Jungwoo’s voice, and Lucas pastes his brightest smile onto his face as he replies, ‘Of course it does! What have you got, Taeyong?’

Taeyong’s shoulders curve back as he points out the different flavours. Jungwoo is seriously nodding his head to everything, but the words filter in one ear and out the other as Lucas takes in the sight of the cakes in front of him.

They’re delicate, and they’d look so perfect in a wedding for Jungwoo and Kun. They’d fit perfectly into the new life that they’re looking to start – quiet and soft and theirs. Lucas wonders how everything seems to fall into place so easily, how he can already picture them on a cake stand in Jungwoo’s parents’ backyard for the wedding.

Jungwoo hums and nods and discusses flavour combinations with Taeyong as they take delicate bites of the cakes. Lucas, by comparison, can’t really stop himself from taking larger bites and practically swallowing the cakes down.

He knows they taste good, but the flavours mix together on his tongue and all he really focuses on is the sweetness of it all.

It’s a bit sickly.

‘I dunno,’ Lucas mutters, shrugging when they look to him. ‘I think Kun’d like the chocolate ones?’ It’s the only opinion he can offer, and he knows that Jungwoo’s not pleased from the way his shoulders heave into a heavy sigh.

He’s supposed to be more useful, but he can’t meet either of their eyes, and plays with the paper. They all taste good, they’re all perfect, because Jungwoo and Kun aren’t fussy or complicated. He says the words, kind of stilted and Taeyong seems appreciative of his commentary.

‘ _What was that_?’ Jungwoo hisses as they walk out of the house. They had to park a few blocks away from the house, and Lucas just wants to melt into the pavement.  ‘Taeyong was being so nice offering to bake for us and you were so cold?’

Lucas doesn’t know how Jungwoo can be so oblivious? How can he not realise that everything they do tears at him inside, reminds him of all the spaces that he doesn’t fit into?

‘I,’ Lucas runs his fingers through his hair, and he can’t look at Jungwoo right now. He exhales and turns away. ‘I need to go.’

He ignores Jungwoo’s voice calling out to him, just jogs in the direction that he knows the station is. He’s got to get used to walking away.

 

 

Kun and Lucas stop outside a nondescript store, about twenty minutes from their place. It’s a store that Lucas knows like the back of his hand and he can’t help the way his heart freezes in his throat.

‘Doyoung’s going to kill you,’ Lucas breathes.

‘We’re hoping that he’ll forgive us,’ Kun steels himself, shoulders curling back as they stare at the front of the store.

‘He’s going to murder you,’ Lucas repeats, because it is worth repeating. ‘Like, slaughter you with his pruning sheers.’

‘We play the best friend card,’ Kun says, hesitating. ‘We play the Jungwoo card. We play every fucking card in our deck. And if he goes for the pruning sheers, _we run_.’

Lucas nods, because that’s the best way to approach this minor mess. It’s maybe two weeks before the wedding, and they’re finally at the florist to get the flowers for the wedding. Years of knowing Doyoung has led them to have an intimate understanding of how floral arrangements work.

And how you have to book in a wedding arrangement months in advance.

They press open the door, and Doyoung looks up from where he’s arranging a bouquet with his customer-service smile on his face. It drops immediately, and Lucas actually shrinks back a bit to hide behind Kun.

‘No,’ Doyoung says, slamming the flowers down in front of him. ‘Don’t you dare ask me what I think you’re going to ask me.’

‘Doyoung,’ Kun starts, smile curving up slightly into the picture of innocence as they walk forward. ‘Please.’

‘Fifteen days,’ Doyoung hisses, ‘until your wedding. And you want me to put together some sort of miracle?’

‘… Yes?’ Kun smiles and his eyes dart to Lucas for a brief, brief moment.

Doyoung reaches for the sheers.

‘Hey, hey, hey,’ Lucas can barely keep his voice steady because Doyoung is terrifying. He’s soft and sweet and kind to the kids, but the moment he turns to the failure adults he surrounds himself by, he becomes a literal demon. ‘Really?’

‘Do you know how much planning goes into this?’ Doyoung brandishes the sheers and Lucas is still waiting for Kun to start running. He won’t abandon him here. ‘I can’t just whip up a wedding arrangement out of nowhere!’

‘Doyoung,’ Kun says, placating hands in front  him. ‘We both know that you’ve had ideas running around your head since I said I wanted to propose. That’s a whole six months.’

‘No, I haven’t,’ Doyoung insists, and Lucas would find it funny if not for the fact that six months is bouncing around his head. He wonders how long it’s been since Kun decided that it was time for him and Jungwoo to become one.

How long it’s been since Kun decided that Lucas fits, but he doesn’t fit _enough_.

‘Doyoung,’ Kun says, patient and low and a little bit scared. ‘Show me what you have.’

There’s a moment of hesitation before Doyoung lets out a sigh. ‘Fine, I’ll show you. But don’t think I’m going to give you a discount. Fuck, leaving it until two weeks before the wedding.’

 

 

‘I can’t believe we left it this late,’ Jungwoo frets as they make their way across town. ‘She’s going to kill me.’

‘She’s not going to kill you,’ Lucas says as he turns the car around another corner. ‘She’s a lovely old lady who looks out for her family.’

Jungwoo raises an eyebrow. ‘That’s because she likes you.’

‘I’m Halmeoni’s favourite,’ Lucas can’t help preening slightly at his own words and it earns a frustrated huff from Jungwoo.

Jungwoo’s grandmother is about five feet tall and could probably take down an army with that tongue of hers. It’s vicious and cruel and nothing like the soft and kind boy that is her grandson. For some reason, that no-one can work out, she took one look at Lucas and decided he was absolutely brilliant.

‘I’m supposed to be her grandson, I don’t know why she likes you more,’ Jungwoo’s half-joking, half-not. His fingers tap a nervous dance onto the dashboard as Lucas slows down in front of the small house. ‘Are you sure you don’t want to ask her for me?’

‘She’s your grandmother,’ Lucas repeats. And it’s your wedding, he’s too much of a coward to add on after.

Jungwoo exhales, taking off his seatbelt, before getting out of the car. He almost steels himself, as Lucas locks the car and makes his way down to the front of the house.

‘Hi, Halmeoni,’ Lucas waves with a smile, when the woman opens the door.

‘Can I please give Kun Halabeoji’s ring for the wedding?’ Jungwoo spits out before even greeting the woman. This is why Halmeoni likes him better.

‘I wanted to see it on Lucas’ finger,’ Halmeoni sniffs as she turns around and walks back into the house, gesturing for them to follow.  

Jungwoo lets out a nervous bleat of laughter, and Lucas feels his stomach fall out of him. He hates, hates, all of this.

 

 

‘What the hell, Xuxi? Seriously, _what the fuck_?’

Lucas looks up from his laptop, blinking the real world into focus as he pulls out his earbuds. Jungwoo is standing by the couch, his face is scrunched up and red and Lucas has never seen him this angry before.

‘Zeus?’ he rubs his eyes. He can’t remember the last time he heard Jungwoo swear in anger, and he closes his laptop.

‘Don’t call me that,’ and Jungwoo picks something up and throws it at him.

It’s Lucas’ gym bag.

‘Oh,’ Lucas looks at the bag in his lap.

Jungwoo is the restless sort of angry. He’s pacing back and forth, hands clenching and unclenching but Lucas can’t move. He wants to catch Jungwoo’s hands in his and press kisses to every knuckle until Jungwoo relaxes and lets go.

But it’s not his place to.

‘I get that you weren’t too keen on the whole wedding planning thing. I thought it was just nerves or something? I don’t know, I thought you just had a lot on your mind. Fuck knows you’ve been so quiet these past few weeks.’ Jungwoo turns around to face Lucas, and he’s heartbroken under the anger. His jaw is clenched and his gaze isn’t settling at all. Lucas doesn’t know what do with this Jungwoo. ‘But I was wrong, wasn’t I? Do you not want this wedding to happen?’

‘No, of course I do,’ Lucas gasps out, dropping his bag to the floor to stand up. ‘I want you to be happy.’

‘Then why have you got a fucking bag hidden in the closet?’ Jungwoo spits out. ‘Were you planning on just running out in the middle of the night? Because that’s what it looks like! Why didn’t you just talk to us or something?’

 ‘What am I supposed to do?’ he laughs, bitter and low. It’s perhaps time that this conversation happens, and hopefully there’s enough time for Jungwoo and Kun to get over it before the wedding next week.

‘You’re not supposed to leave,’ Jungwoo says, and this time he bursts into tears.

Lucas can’t help the frustration and fear and anger that rushes through him. Because why does Jungwoo get to be mad and upset about this when Lucas is barely holding himself together at the seams.

‘You’re getting married, Jungwoo,’ Lucas’ voice starts to rise against his will. He hates when his voice fills a space like this, with anger and fear, because it echoes and hits back at himself and sends him deeper into the spiral of a fight. ‘You’re getting married!’

Jungwoo hands have dropped to his side, and his mouth has dropped open. He’s almost as tall as Lucas, but he looks so small standing there opposite Lucas. He’s still crying, sobbing but his anger seems to have dwindled out at Lucas’s anger.

‘Please, don’t make me do this,’ Lucas whispers. ‘Don’t make me watch you guys walk away from me.’

‘Xuxi,’ Jungwoo whispers, and his voice echoes through their apartment. ‘Oh, _baby_.’

Lucas flinches back, and Jungwoo lets out a laugh that’s half a sob.

The door creaks open, and Kun’s voice echoes throughout the apartment as he comes home. He’s wearing his favourite cardigan, over a button up shirt, and he stops in the entrance way, eyes moving between Jungwoo, Lucas and the bag of clothes on the couch.

‘What’s going on?’ Kun asks, voice hesitant.

Jungwoo hasn’t moved an inch, eyes fixed on Lucas. He’s still crying, but he’s got that beautiful smile of his pulling at his cheeks. Kun walks into the room, looking between the two men and Lucas can’t look at him either.

Instead, he drops his gaze to his feet.

Jungwoo stumbles forward into Kun, murmuring something too low into his ear. Lucas tries to ignore it, even as Kun lets out a laugh. He knows that Kun’s not cruel, but the sound slashes at him as Kun walks closer.

‘Baby, we’re getting married,’ Kun whispers, he leans up and cups Lucas’ jaw to press a kiss to his lips. Jungwoo presses himself in close next to Kun and his tear-streaked face finds its place in Lucas’ shoulder. ‘All three of us. Together.’

 

 

(‘Mark,’ Lucas hisses into his phone the next morning. ‘Mark. I’m getting married?’

‘Dude,’ Mark’s words mumble together and Donghyuck’s whining about it being too early, ‘the wedding isn’t for like another two days?’

‘No, I mean… I’m getting married!’

‘I know, dude, that’s why I threw you a bachelor party?’)

 

**Author's Note:**

> [twt](http://twitter.com/neocitz) | [cc](http://curiouscat.me/neocitz)


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